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Some children have a difficult time playing with peers. A common problem that I see in the classroom is the child’s tendency to play alone. This tends to be “easier” for the child. They are not in a situtation where they have to communicate, which might be challenging for them if they have a speech delay or are simply shy. They get to be in control of the activitiy and do not have to face sharing with others or participate in turn taking. Others gravitate to adults. Adults tend let the child pick what to play with and are much more patient. Adults have creative ideas for play and are good at sharing (well usually)! Children who might lack confidence in their communication and/or play skills might play “around” other peers. There is a sense of desire but they are not willing to make the first move to join in play. Parents and teachers can help children learn ways to play.

Playing alone: Encourage interest in materials that support group play or building with blocks. Set up a play date with one or two other peers. In a smaller group the child will have an opportunitiy to get to know the other children and won’t be overwhelmed due to the amount of activity if the group was larger. Help the child play by assisting them taking turns and requesting toys. Set up contrived situations to assist in increasing the amount of opportunities that are provided.

Playing only with adults: Help shift the child’s attention to peers their age. Try and set up play opportunities with other children who have the same temperment, interests and behavior. Invite a peer to play who is slightly younger to boost your child’s confidence. Play with them at first and assist them exchange information. Fade your assistance as you see the child improve.

Playing “around” others: Draw the child’s attention to what children are playing with. Ask them if they want to play with you and the others. It might help talk about play ideas that relate to what the others are doing or hand them a prop they could use. This will help the child enter the area of play with an idea already in mind. Help them call a child’s name and suggest their idea.

Remember to keep it fun! Play should be an enjoyable time for both you and the child.